Man cakes

football cupcake Emm Page Buttercream Cakes London.jpg

Cake will be the very last medium to challenge gender stereotypes, for example:

Colin the Caterpillar Cake recently married girlfriend Connie, rendering the (pretty much always desperate) quest for a single gender-neutral supermarket cake impossible.

Colin the Caterpillar Cake recently married girlfriend Connie, rendering the (pretty much always desperate) quest for a single gender-neutral supermarket cake impossible.

 

In a few centuries' time, when we all have to wear concrete Heelies to traverse the radioactive soil, women will still be receiving fondant Louboutin stiletto cakes for big birthdays, like kids you see nowadays chatting into Chatterphones.

When customers want a man cake, there has to be a ball. Of course a skilled fondant baker could craft a seaworthy catamaran or a whole hockey team with jointed limbs, but my one effort to pipe a rugby scrum resulted in a pile of squirmy soft-shelled turtles. And smoothing the frosting on a VW Beetle became so distressing that a friend had to take two days off work to counsel me through it.

So it's a relief to have a ball to play with really. This super rugby ball was supplied by www.welshchocolates.co.uk. It weighs a ton (no wonder the lovely lady I dealt with was so confident about it surviving the post, it's almost solid) so I've supported it on a dowelled board. The drip cake is a perfect format for mixing up motifs. Because it's so chaotic, there's no expectation of scale or realism.

smaller rugby drip cake Emma Page Buttercream Cakes London.jpg

Even a drip cake without a ball is man enough. A riot of meringues, candied popcorn, chocolate shards, macarons and sweets, maybe topped off with a blazing firework candle for maximum macho effect. We'll challenge gender stereotypes tomorrow.

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Emma Page